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  #21  
Old 03-18-2004, 07:06 AM
Trooper
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I'm Here for You



Shawn

You'll continue in my prayers untill you request me to stop, and I don't expect that will happen any time soon.

You can go to the members area and get my E-mail address. I try to check my mail two or three times a day.
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  #22  
Old 03-18-2004, 06:08 PM
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a long time coming

Shawn,
some times I get the feeling that we are all just spinning our wheels. Sometimes a thank-you goes a long way. And it costs nothing.

Depression?

Maybe we should move that to the PTSD issue thread and talk about it?

We did beat up anger a little and still have a lot to talk about.....but seems to be ok for now......

Maybe some of the lurkers we have here might want to jump in too.

Shawn, everyone I know thinks they did not do enough and when they left, there were still guys in the field and felt that they abandoned them for safety. Hard concept.
Not your call to be sent, or sent home.

I once thought about attending a demonstration at University of Buffalo in 1969, for a little "fellowship", but the Guard and local police and State Troopers had already moved in before I could get there, so there was no chance of getting involved. My neighbor was a city Police officer at the time and taking courses at the college and when the professor found out he was a cop, he gave him a failing grade and the college let it stand. Left wing anti war, anti U.S. jerks. Those were strange times.

Seems like same stuff, different days and years.......some stuff never changes.

Dana
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  #23  
Old 03-31-2004, 12:33 PM
Shawn Powell
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Blue Here we go again....

Dana,

Just heard on the news that four grunts got nailed by roadside bomb today. They didn't say if they were KIA, just that they were medevac'd by 0745 HRS raghead time. Also five civilians, Americans employed by either Brown & Root or Haliburton were ambushed. All dead, all drug through the streets and hung on a bridge in Fallujah. One of our missions was to supply 2-3 man 'shooter' teams to provide local security for the civilian contractors for just that reason.

I again am looking at the life of King David. As a boy he confronted Goliath's stupid ass, glared at him... "I come against you in the name of the God of the Armies of Israel!!" And then runs at him, spinning his slingshot. He kills the enemy of his nation then hacks off Goliath's ugly head and shows it to the Philistine army..."GET SOME...!!"

Got my dander up a little bit... Dana, it's HARD to spectate!
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  #24  
Old 03-31-2004, 06:21 PM
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Angeldevil

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawn Powell
Dana,

Just heard on the news that four grunts got nailed by roadside bomb today. They didn't say if they were KIA, just that they were medevac'd by 0745 HRS raghead time. Also five civilians, Americans employed by either Brown & Root or Haliburton were ambushed. All dead, all drug through the streets and hung on a bridge in Fallujah. One of our missions was to supply 2-3 man 'shooter' teams to provide local security for the civilian contractors for just that reason.

I again am looking at the life of King David. As a boy he confronted Goliath's stupid ass, glared at him... "I come against you in the name of the God of the Armies of Israel!!" And then runs at him, spinning his slingshot. He kills the enemy of his nation then hacks off Goliath's ugly head and shows it to the Philistine army..."GET SOME...!!"

Got my dander up a little bit... Dana, it's HARD to spectate!
Shawn,
Most of the time we never got into big firefights or battles. Our objective was to keep the roadways clear for convoys and regular travel in the Arizona area. Spectate was part of our day to day routine. The ocaisonal firefight or ambush was good for us because we never really had any opportunity for "payback", as all our casualties were caused by mines, booby traps and "roadside" bombs. ALL our casualties. But that sounds like today. Five Marines killed in Fallujah by a roadside bomb. Three Marines wounded and one KIA on AnHoa Road....by roadside bomb.....three soldiers killed by mine in Bosnia...One Marine killed by mine on An Hoa Road....soldiers killed by exploding woman at checkpoint in Iraq...Marines killed by child with explosives strapped to his back in DaNang.....

It does not get easier....and the headlines and sound bites are just like thirty five years ago.....hard to distinguish then and now when I hear it on the Radio......dander up?? How about anger up??

Good to see you here Shawn. Appreciate your posts.
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  #25  
Old 04-01-2004, 10:47 AM
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Banghead Re: PTSD Questions

Dana we chewed the same mud bro. I was all around Arizona terr. and AN-Hoa was headquathers for me too bro. Remember Go Noi Island near liberty bridge there was consent fighting there always. These snip attack's work on the head of those over there, and bring back the Nam to me. I see with regret another Nam happening.
Vic
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  #26  
Old 04-01-2004, 05:06 PM
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Confused Re: PTSD Questions

Quote:
Originally Posted by Reconvic
Dana we chewed the same mud bro. I was all around Arizona terr. and AN-Hoa was headquathers for me too bro. Remember Go Noi Island near liberty bridge there was consent fighting there always. These snip attack's work on the head of those over there, and bring back the Nam to me. I see with regret another Nam happening.
Vic
Hey Vic,
I feel the same way. The terminology gets me thinking of 35 yars ago, and then get snapped back to the current reality. But it is real hard to distinguish from the distance. Shawn says its real hard to "spectate" and he just came home from there. I remember the complete and utter feeling of relief that I was home and at the very same time "knowing" that there was unfinished business in RVN and guilt because I was here and they ain't. Still get that today. Look at pictures and see dead guys. Kids that I loved like my own brothers and look and see a kid that is me. Brain is frozen in time at that instant and then I hear the news, now about Marines and I am there? Or there? Or here?
What about now??
And you know what?? When I got "home", I was never "HOME". It was a different place. Everything was the same but completely different. It all was in slow motion. I remember when I first saw my Mom. Man, I missed her, then I got the car and went and got my brothers out of school.
What a time.....same but always never the same anymore and you cant go back.

WHO KNEW???????
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  #27  
Old 04-01-2004, 06:27 PM
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Re: PTSD Questions

Quote:
Originally Posted by Danausmc
Hey Vic,
I feel the same way. The terminology gets me thinking of 35 yars ago, and then get snapped back to the current reality. But it is real hard to distinguish from the distance. Shawn says its real hard to "spectate" and he just came home from there. I remember the complete and utter feeling of relief that I was home and at the very same time "knowing" that there was unfinished business in RVN and guilt because I was here and they ain't. Still get that today. Look at pictures and see dead guys. Kids that I loved like my own brothers and look and see a kid that is me. Brain is frozen in time at that instant and then I hear the news, now about Marines and I am there? Or there? Or here?
What about now??
And you know what?? When I got "home", I was never "HOME". It was a different place. Everything was the same but completely different. It all was in slow motion. I remember when I first saw my Mom. Man, I missed her, then I got the car and went and got my brothers out of school.
What a time.....same but always never the same anymore and you cant go back.

WHO KNEW???????

I agree, I get it double, I always wonder if it's my son.
I also pulled 2 or 3 opts on Go Noi Island, with 1/26. The 3 times I came home it was not home, I just couldn't adjust, that took yrs. I still wonder at times if I have? I hate ehen something like this is able to set me off alittle.
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  #28  
Old 04-02-2004, 06:55 AM
Shawn Powell
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Re: PTSD Questions

Hey Marines, Hey Troop...
I'll probably keep writing more and more re: what's going on in the sandbox. Thanks for your ears and patience...! Dana, it was awesome talking to you last night. That made my day!

Go with Jesus, bros.
Shawn
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  #29  
Old 04-02-2004, 07:03 AM
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Re: PTSD Questions

Shawn

We're here for you, that's what brothers are for.
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  #30  
Old 04-03-2004, 12:24 PM
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Re: PTSD Questions

Quote:
Originally Posted by usmc26th
I agree, I get it double, I always wonder if it's my son.
I also pulled 2 or 3 opts on Go Noi Island, with 1/26. The 3 times I came home it was not home, I just couldn't adjust, that took yrs. I still wonder at times if I have? I hate ehen something like this is able to set me off alittle.
It is something we Vets fight off everyday. I also see a VA Doc (Shrink) because I awake still at some things I have in the Nam. I was with Recon Battlion. I also have a real short fuse with the help from God I will be able to control one day. Semper Fi brother.
Vic
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  #31  
Old 04-04-2004, 01:26 PM
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Re: PTSD Questions/Liberty Bridge Etc.

Small world out there. I was also all over Arizona Territory, Dodge City. Hills 10 and 37. 7th Marines/ Brief stint with a CAP Unit before transfer to MAG 16.
The crazy thing that is bringing back memories this month is the reinstatment of the use of the CAP Units in Baghdad. And low and behold they are attached to 1/7 Marines again!!
I am in a PTSD Group at the VET Center here. We have been together for a year and a half now. Do you all still want me to share some of our "homework" assingments on this site? Or is that maybe a little to impersonal? Please advise. Mike
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  #32  
Old 04-05-2004, 02:01 AM
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Re: PTSD Questions

Well after two years of trying to get on with Customs as an Inspector and trying for WA State DOC and having been DQ'ed because of PTSD and Depression, it sucks, I'm trying for Disability now. In the past year I've tried three different States and I'm back in WA now. My wife is on Disability. Got laid off from Qwest after 23 years in Dec 2001 and still really haven't found work.
Nothing stupid, just numb, as to why. It's not from the lack of trying. I dunno maybe employers see something I don't see in myself perhaps burnout???
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  #33  
Old 04-05-2004, 06:40 AM
Shawn Powell
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Re: PTSD Questions/Liberty Bridge Etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by chapmick
Small world out there. I was also all over Arizona Territory, Dodge City. Hills 10 and 37. 7th Marines/ Brief stint with a CAP Unit before transfer to MAG 16.
The crazy thing that is bringing back memories this month is the reinstatment of the use of the CAP Units in Baghdad. And low and behold they are attached to 1/7 Marines again!!
I am in a PTSD Group at the VET Center here. We have been together for a year and a half now. Do you all still want me to share some of our "homework" assingments on this site? Or is that maybe a little to impersonal? Please advise. Mike
Hope everyone's weekend went well. Mic, I'm kind of interested as I wrote before. Dana, what do you think? I've been devouring Chuck's book... it really hits close to home... he talks about courses of action to take regarding the different symptoms of PTSD. Is it along those lines, Mic?

Shawn.
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  #34  
Old 04-05-2004, 10:35 AM
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Cross Glow Sm Clr Re: PTSD Questions/Liberty Bridge Etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawn Powell
Hope everyone's weekend went well. Mic, I'm kind of interested as I wrote before. Dana, what do you think? I've been devouring Chuck's book... it really hits close to home... he talks about courses of action to take regarding the different symptoms of PTSD. Is it along those lines, Mic?

Shawn.

Shawn

Glad to hear that Chuck's books are a help to you, they were to me. I work for the County Mental Health and recently had a flashback in front of a doctor. After being off meds (With VA Approval) for 20 years, I'm now on 100MG of Zantac daily, for a "low Grade depression" as a condition of employment. The county doesn't know the power of my GOD.
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  #35  
Old 04-05-2004, 12:41 PM
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Re: PTSD Questions

To All,
Yes the homework that I am referencing is along the lines of Chuck's book, which was also my salvation. Particularly the idea of replacing the idols and demons of War with the unconditional love of Christ. It prevents me from feeling abandoned, and being so aggressive in responses. The information that we work with each week in the group are simply a set of tools to use to slow us down from going to 'lizard brain' And we all seem to be better for the work. The Group is comprised of; 3 Airborne;4 Marines;1 CIA, 1 Combat Photographer. 1 Desert Storm and 1 Korean Vet(POW). We are all Christian, and we are all there for each other- just like here. Unless I hear to the contrary I will post some of the 'homework" and you can all respond accordingly. If you do not like it- "It don't mean nothin'" I won't go to lizard brain! I will go to prayer.
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  #36  
Old 04-05-2004, 05:03 PM
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Re: PTSD Questions

Well, lets try it and see. I remember Lou said he would join in too. Maybe we can get some of the new folks in too. Im for it. Start a new thread in the PTSD FORUM so we can keep it in one place.
Dana
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  #37  
Old 04-07-2004, 08:05 AM
Shawn Powell
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Re: PTSD Questions

Quote:
Originally Posted by snowyowl
Well after two years of trying to get on with Customs as an Inspector and trying for WA State DOC and having been DQ'ed because of PTSD and Depression, it sucks, I'm trying for Disability now. In the past year I've tried three different States and I'm back in WA now. My wife is on Disability. Got laid off from Qwest after 23 years in Dec 2001 and still really haven't found work.
Nothing stupid, just numb, as to why. It's not from the lack of trying. I dunno maybe employers see something I don't see in myself perhaps burnout???
Were you looking at a Customs Inspector in Washington or anywhere in the US? Seems I remember there being a hiring freeze for the new "Bureau of Customs and Border Protection."
I would've responded sooner to your post, bro... guess I need to slow down a bit and digest what I am reading more. You read Chuck's book? It's opened my eyes... each chapter's got a section on steps to recovery for some of the characteristics of PTSD. Depression being one of them....
Can I do anything? I can pray of course... give you some encouragement, you and the wife. I know that when I fall into my valleys it gets tough... I don't wanna seek God because I think my 'prayers' are going no further than the ceiling of my house.
I went for a long walk last night... well, two miles to the local Starbucks and two miles back. I was really uptight, man... all the fighting in Iraq... KIAs... yours truly is spectating, you know the feeling? You know what triggered this 'attack', bro? OPRAH FRIGGIN WINFREY. Caught a glimpse of her show... she was visiting some severely wounded but recovering warriors from the fighting in the sandbox. Man, I'm talking kids that were severely burned... some missing one or both legs, missing arms. I looked at those boys, each one wanted to go back and join the fight... fat ass Oprah just couldn't comprehend that, it was beyond her. I wanted to hold those boys... just thank them and ask where they were from... ask the Lord to heal them and show Himself strong on their behalf... words to that effect, anyway.
So now I feel like I'm suffocating and I go on my walk... I get a coffee at Starbucks (That's like getting a vanilla cone at Baskin-Robbins) and I sit and read a bit from Chuck's book. I started to relax a bit as I'm reading about triggers... AGAIN. Then on the way home... the one thing I kept praying... the one thing that the Holy Spirit put on my heart was "Please Lord. Protect me from those that want to do me harm." And "Jesus, thank you for interceding for me like it says you are doing in Hebrews." That's what I was praying as I walked home. I guess what became of it was that I started to cool a bit... and had one of the rare experiences that I knew God was in control... He loved me and knew what I was going through. I wish everyday could be like that.
Stand firm, bro. I'm here to be a sounding board, at least. I'm praying for you too... I know God has a plan and a purpose for the both of us, it's just gonna be a day at a time obviously.

God Bless.
Shawn.
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  #38  
Old 04-07-2004, 04:51 PM
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Re: PTSD Questions

April 2002 I asked for WA but was willing to relocate just about anywhere; like Montana, Alaska, Minnesota, Maine when I mailed my paperwork in and took my test.
I again took the test last year and passed both times.
Washington State has been my "Spiritual Vietnam" for many many years.
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  #39  
Old 06-30-2008, 05:05 AM
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Re: PTSD Questions

Please keep your head up ! and your eyes on jesus


With our head down is a sign of being defeated,
Please take it to God he understands
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