Thread: PTSD Homework
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Old 08-03-2005, 08:48 PM
Stickthrower
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Cross Glow Lg Clr 2 Re: PTSD Homework

Chapmic,

Thanks for the welcome. The Good Lord knows I needed you guys and fortunately through my chaplin friend introduced me to Pointman. Pointman has been a true lifesaver for me. I had the good luck to meet Chuck Dean in person and have signed copies of his books, as well as numerous other Pointman Brothers, of whom all have been will continue to be an inspiration to me.

Now that I am "Retired" from Law Enforcement I have started to open my eyes to the fact that not everyone I meet is a bad person. The Lord has sent numerous Guardian Angels to me when I needed them most. Like I said earlier & Chuck Dean said best "I thought God had went AWOL" while I was in Viet Nam. And was convinced upon my return that He hated me.

I now know that it was me that stopped loving Him. I say Thanks many times each day to the Lord for sending all the Pointmen I have met to me in my time of need, as well as for many local angels!

I know I will never be "cured", but I am much happier than I have ever been in my life. I now sleep at night and not with an AR15 in my hands, no longer get drunk so I can "relax" around family/friends, have quit jumping at every unusual sound, go to Church regularly, no longer live my life hating people, and best of all I am learning to forgive. It is amazing how much better my life is when I stop hating & holding grudges.

I read the Bible a lot and have started trying to live my life by asking myself this question "What would Jesus do" when I need to make a decision or feel myself wavering. And best of all, I am learning to forgive myself, that is the hardest!

I still have my PTSD DAYS, however I am getting better as I no longer will allow myself to get depressed. When I feel it coming on I just find something to do, no matter how hard it is at the time. Many times I just wanted to give up, but I look at my children and think about how much they mean to me! That is a real energizer!

I would just like to say thanks to all my brothers and Welcome Home! You guys have made life possible for me and I will never forget that! I believe that as long as we stick together and watch each others backs we will survive and concure our Demons.
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